Foolish Notions Read online

  “It’s okay to lose control.” His hand slid up her thigh, parting her legs further as his fingertips touched the soft satin of her underwear.

  Whistles, hollers, and clapping swept up the beach toward them. Loud cheers filled the warm air around them. James pulled Samantha to him, shielding her, as he looked over his shoulder in the direction of the bonfire. In the diffuse dusk light, there wasn’t much they could make out, but they obviously got the gist of it.

  Samantha pulled her hands from his torso like she was being scalded. “We can’t do this.”

  “Don’t.”

  Samantha pushed against the wall of his chest and slid off the table. Once she gained her bearings she stepped away from him, her breath catching as she did

  “Let’s go in,” he said, gesturing toward the door.

  “No.”

  “Samantha,” he said hesitantly.

  Samantha shook her head and then rubbed her hands over her face briskly. The night air was cool against her heated skin. She shivered and moved to the table, where she found her hair clip. After securing her hair, she picked up a stack of dishes she had stacked earlier.

  “What are you doing?”

  She set the dishes back down again as she struggled with her emotions. “I’m sorry.”

  “Don’t apologize to me,” James said in a disgusted tone.

  Samantha’s hand went to her head and she rubbed her brow and looked back at him. “I don’t know what’s happening to me.” She continued to press her hand against her head. “There’s probably a word for it in some thick fancy textbook.” Her eyes dropped. “There’s something definitely wrong with me.”

  “There’s nothing wrong with you.” He took the hand that was at her brow and brought it to his lips. “Relax.”

  “I can’t,” she whispered in honest desperation.

  “Sure you can.” He linked his fingers with hers. “The word’s called lust, Angel.”

  She pulled her hand away. “Don’t. I can’t think when you do that.” She closed her eyes while she organized her thoughts.

  “There’s nothing fancy or complicated about it.”

  “This is a dangerous game and one I don’t want to play.”

  “This isn’t a game, Samantha.”

  When she opened her eyes they locked intently on James. “You’re wasting your time; you know that, don’t you?”

  James felt like someone had doused him with a cup of cold water “Let me be the one to decide that.” He took her hand again; he wouldn’t lose the ground he had just gained. He wasn’t blind, he’d seen, could still see, the desire she was trying to hide behind a cold veneer.

  She looked down at her hand. “Find someone else, because I’m not interested.”

  “I don’t want someone else.” Light flickered in his eyes. “I want you.”

  “You want me because you can’t have me.” She chewed on her bottom lip. “There are hundreds of women who have nice smelling hair who would love to be wined, dined, and seduced by you.”

  “They’re not you.” With no change in his expression he spoke again. “Besides, your ‘you only want what you can’t have’ analogy doesn’t apply to me.” His head tilted to the side. “I always get what I want.”

  Ignoring the underlying warning, she said, “Not this time.”

  “Always—”

  Pure frustration consumed her eyes. “Talking to you is like talking to a wall; it’s pointless. Why aren’t you listening to me? Don’t you get it? I don’t want this.”

  “I am listening to you. I heard you loud and clear at the restaurant the other night, and I sure as hell don’t think I was misinterpreting you just a minute ago.” He gestured behind him at the bonfire. “I think they heard you loud and clear, too.”

  “All of it was a mistake.”

  “It seems like you’re making a lot of mistakes lately, Samantha.” He waited for a minute. “If the same mistake is repeated many times, is it still considered a mistake?”

  “Business slow at work, James?” she snapped.

  He was all too aware of where she was going. His eyes turned dark. “Don’t go there, Samantha.”

  “Why not?” She flung her hands in the air. “You’ve already made it clear that you’re looking for a challenge.” Her eyes narrowed as she dared him.

  James’s back went stiff as he felt the anger rise in him. He fought to keep control, for the ground she was choosing to venture into wasn’t safe. And she damn well knew it.

  “I guess that’s what I’ve become . . . a challenge.” She spoke the next words in a mocking tone. “One of James Taylor’s little challenges.” Her eyebrows lifted slightly in inquiry as her blue eyes flashed. “Is the Europe deal already closed? Or perhaps it’s not challenging enough for you. I know how quickly you get bored.”

  Her sing-song voice shot to his core. Moving his hand to the back of his neck, James massaged the shooting pain that was spreading rapidly. Even with all his determination not to get angry, he felt something deep inside him coil tightly. “Samantha, I would stop if I were you.”

  “I’m not one of your little workers you can order around.”

  James’s jaw was tightly fixed as he bit back the anger she was dangerously tapping into.

  “I’m not a pawn in one of your million-dollar deals. And I’m sure the hell not some company or contract you can manipulate and make yours.”

  “That’s enough.” Sure, he had treated other women like they were at his disposal, but never Samantha. Samantha was never a passing fancy. He might have loved her obsessively, possessively, and a little recklessly, but it was because he had been overwhelmed by what he had felt for her.

  She took a step back. Her eyes were ice cold. “All you big businessmen are alike. You don’t care about the people around you.”

  “Don’t put our relationship in that category. Don’t you dare compare what we shared to what others share.” It stung to have her strip their relationship down to nothing more than average.

  “Why? Are we so different? We’ve ended up like most of them anyway.” She shrugged. “Besides, it belongs there. I was no different than any of the other guy’s girlfriends—”

  “You were entirely different.”

  She shook her head. “If I had been, then maybe you wouldn’t have felt the need to do what you did. Maybe you wouldn’t have wanted to turn to someone else.”

  James wanted to take her by the shoulders and shake some sense into her. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “I know I was naïve and stupid to think you weren’t like them.” She used the back of her hand to push the wisps of hair from her eyes. “Name one man who you work with who hasn’t cheated.”

  He remained silent.

  “You can’t, can you? Endless meetings, extremely long working hours, business trips, conventions, parties, women—”

  “Are you suggesting that in my type of business, work and cheating go hand in hand?” He moved closer. “I want to hear you admit it.”

  She slapped the back of one hand against the palm of the other, in a display of absolute agitation. Her voice rose as she spoke. “You’re the one who wants me to admit to everything.

  Goddamn it, how about you admit that what we had didn’t mean a damn thing to you. I want to hear you admit that all of it was a farce.”

  He stood there watching her vigilantly. His entire body seemed to vibrate.

  Samantha’s eyes darted over his shoulder to the bonfire and then back to him. Her words were as cold as ice when she finally spoke. “Imagine what you could obtain if you could seduce a company and make it yours. You’d make the Fortune 500 list for at least a decade.”

  He inched toward her, infuriated with her accusations. He didn’t want to hear any more. “Do I even have to seduce you, Samantha? From your display moments before, not much seduction is needed.”

  The question hit her full force. “How dare you.”

  “Afraid to answer the question?” His
voice taunted as he watched a turbulent storm flash in her eyes. “Or are we not wasting words over the obvious?”

  “You’re a heartless monster,” she said, her eyes brimming with anger.

  He opened his mouth and then shut it again. Moving forward he purposely took the clip out of her hair and let it tumble around his arm. With two fingers he touched the sensitive area behind her ear and ran them down her neck, across her chest, into the soft area between her breasts. “Apparently I am.” The kiss he placed on her shaking lips wasn’t meant to please.

  Chapter Seventeen

  James craned his neck in an awkward fashion to try to alleviate some of the pain he was experiencing. Goddamn he was sore. He had left Samantha standing on the deck last night and had come to his office, because she had not only infuriated him, she had completely knocked him off balance. He looked up, momentarily pretending he was listening to the person giving a presentation at the end of the long conference table. He was good at appearing interested.

  His thoughts drifted again. The last time he had slept on that damn couch in his office had been when Samantha had left him. He had stayed at his office for over two weeks because he couldn’t stand being at home or in bed without her. He had left last night for just the opposite reason. She was there. The pain in his neck tensed. He thought about the small tin in the top of his desk drawer that contained aspirin and fought the urge to make a mad dash for it.

  The person giving the presentation paused and handed out a packet to everyone. When James got the green folder he absentmindedly creased the first page open with the edge of this thumb. He only heard the speaker’s first few words before he was lost in the mayhem of the previous night. He had been outraged when Samantha insinuated that he was some ruthless, heartless man. He felt his grip tighten on the pen; he looked down and saw his knuckles turn white and released it. He wasn’t the cold-hearted son-of-a-bitch that she was making him out to be.

  He mulled that over for a minute. Okay, that wasn’t entirely true. He was a little merciless when it came to business. In his line of work ruthlessness was a prerequisite. But he had never been merciless with Samantha. The hard-nosed trait that allowed him to excel in his profession was never brought home. She had been what balanced it and kept it in check.

  He felt himself getting angry all over again. She had been way off base to suggest otherwise. Did she truly believe that he thought she and their relationship was no better than a business deal? No better than some of his colleagues’ relationships? What they had was more intense and more real than anything he’d ever experienced. How dare she belittle that.

  He took a sip of the coffee that Shelly had handed him over forty minutes ago, when the meeting had first started. She had told him he looked like he needed it as she shoved it into one hand and a thick file into the other. The cold, bitter drink did nothing but ignite the burning that had been smoldering in his stomach. Between the excruciating pain in the top portion of his body and the burning in the lower, all he wanted to do was toss everything off the table, lie across it, and groan until the pain subsided.

  When the presentation ended he pushed all his soreness to the back of his mind and focused on the room. It was his turn to take the floor. Looking up, he gave a nod of approval to the speaker. “Very good, Rick.” He then looked over to a young man just out of prep school. “Doug, I want you to put together a team to go over to Europe and work on the new merger.” He examined his calendar. “Have a preliminary list for me to review by next week. I want to get them over there as soon as possible.”

  “Yes, sir. However, they want to put together their own team.” Doug started to pass James some papers. “Here is their list—”

  James looked up after jotting some notes. “I want our own people there. At least for the first six months.”

  “I agree. That was going to be my recommendation,” Doug said lightly.

  “Good.” James did little more than glance up. “Then we’re on the same page.”

  “However—”

  “I don’t like howevers, Doug.”

  “They are being very persistent—”

  “I don’t give a damn what they want or how persistent they are being.” He took a deep breath to steady himself. “There was nothing in the contract stating this.”

  Doug nodded. “True. But we never divulged that we wanted our people in there either. They’re worried about job security.”

  “The acquisitions team explained to them there would be some downsizing. Unfortunately, some employees are going to become nonessential because of the merger. This isn’t something new to them.” James reached for the coffee but didn’t take a drink; he didn’t think his stomach could take a drop more.

  “We have a commitment—”

  “To our company, Doug,” James said unsympathetically.

  “I’m making you personally responsible for putting their minds at ease. Reassure them that we’ve hand-picked the right professionals to head this.”

  Doug only nodded.

  “No mistakes. If this merger collapses it will be costly.”

  James looked down and sifted through some papers, then glanced back at the rest of the group. “I think that’s it.” He looked to Raymond. “Is there anything you’d like to add?”

  “No, I think that about covers it.”

  James lifted his briefcase from the floor onto the table. “See everyone Monday morning.”

  In his office he glared at the couch, which was two feet shorter than he was. The expensive piece of furniture was the cause of all the pain that was rapidly creeping across his shoulders and down his back. He couldn’t sleep on it again. He wouldn’t be able to walk in the morning if he did.

  “Mr. Taylor.” Shelly poked her head into his office. “I’m getting ready to leave. Do you want me to order you some dinner?”

  James shook his head. “That won’t be necessary.”

  “I can get you a blanket and a pillow if you are staying the night again.” She motioned over her shoulder. “I think there are some things in the closet in the lounge.”

  He shook his head. “Thank you, but I’ll be going home tonight.” He might not be welcomed but he was going nonetheless. His mom would know something was the matter if he didn’t come home, and he didn’t want her to worry. That was the last thing she needed.

  “Is everything okay, Mr. Taylor? I hope you don’t mind my saying, but you haven’t seemed like yourself lately. Is your mom doing all right?”

  “She’s doing as well as can be expected.” He was going through the list of messages Shelly had set on his desk. He held the dozen or so memos in the air. “Are any of these urgent?”

  “Nothing that can’t wait until Monday.”

  He tossed the blue pieces of paper on his desk and looked up. He smiled for the first time that day. “I’m fine, too. Go home to your husband and have a great weekend.”

  “You try and do the same.”

  “I will.” When he heard the door click shut he stretched his arms over his head. The muscles in his back felt like a mesh of tight cords. They protested against his movement so he dropped them back to his sides. He needed his recliner, an ice-cold beer, and the sports channel.

  * * * * *

  Samantha saw the headlights through the bedroom window as James pulled into the drive. Her stomach fluttered as she bent to tie her sneakers. She had been hoping to have been gone by now. She looked at her watch; it was her turn to drive to yoga class and she was running fifteen minutes late. Paul would undoubtedly be worried about her if she didn’t get a move on it. Taking the bag off the bed she left the room and went down the hall. She looked in on Marie. “I’m going.”

  Marie smiled over the book she was reading. “Have a nice class, dear.”

  “I will.” She set the gym bag at the door and moved into the room. “James just pulled in, so you won’t be alone.”

  “Did you keep a plate warming?”

  Samantha closed the blinds beside the bed.
“Yes, just as you requested.” She went into the bathroom and turned out the light.

  “The corn bread is wrapped in foil in the oven and the chili is in the Crock-Pot on low.” Before she set a little bottle of pills on the nightstand, she emptied one into a clear cup. “If the pain gets too bad, take one.”

  Marie regarded the pills. “I’ll be fine.”

  “Don’t be stubborn.”

  “If I take one of those I forget who I am for a day.”

  “That’s why you take them at night.” She moved back to the bed and hugged Marie. “Now, you’re going to be okay?”

  “We already discussed this, this morning. I’m fine.”

  “Sleep tight.”

  * * * * *

  Marie wasn’t reading for more than ten minutes before James walked in. “Hi.” He winced as he bent down to kiss her.

  Marie leaned forward to meet his kiss. “You must have left early this morning.” She patted his cheek. “I didn’t hear you get up.”

  James didn’t look at his mom. Instead he leaned against the wall because standing on his own was too much effort. He crossed his legs at the ankles, and shifted his weight to find a more comfortable position. His attempts were wasted. Nothing was going to put him out of his misery.

  “You look tired. Have you had a busy day?”

  “Very busy. We’re trying to set everything up in Europe.”

  “Will you have to go over there?”

  “Possibly.” He reassured her with a smile. “But not for a while yet. Deals like this take time.” He would have to go when the merger was closed, but until then he would send someone else, because he wasn’t going to leave her. “How do you feel?”

  “Good. I think I’m regaining some of my strength,” she said brightly.

  “That’s good to hear.”

  “Yeah, but the next treatment is going to knock me back down.”

  His tone lightened. “But it’s your last treatment. You’re almost done.”

  “I know.” She looked toward the door. “Did you see Samantha?”